INDONESIA
smile.

The six of us were getting pretty used to traveling in countries where the people we met spoke very little English. In the previous months of the show we had gotten into the bad habit of having private conversations publicly, assuming that people did not understand us. Now, after several days of foreign travel, we arrived in London. Brad forgot that the English, well, speak English. Riding on the underground, Brad yelled to me across the cab, "Man these cats are unhappy!" Shocked and embarrassed I looked sheepishly around the train at the two-dozen or so passengers. Not a single one had reacted. They all stared straight ahead. "Wow, you're right" I called back.

When we were welcomed in West Java, the local elders demonstrated their respect for us by offering what they thought was our traditional Western greeting, a handshake. It was one of the most awkward greetings I have ever experienced—because the meaning behind our cultural greetings are fundamentally different. Theirs is a gesture of unity, ours of individuality.

In Java, whenever we passed people in the village, their faces gleamed with expansive smiles—as if seeing us made them feel the happiest they had ever been.  But this was true for everyone, every time. Initially smiling back seemed forced and contrived, but the Javans’ glee was contagious. Soon I too couldn't help myself from smiling at every person I passed.

There is something about smiling with another person that transcends the ego. I could speak with very few of the villagers and knew hardly any of their names. But when we looked each other in the eyes and smiled, we shared with each other in one simple smile something so much deeper. We were exchanging how magical and wonderful it is to be alive and to experience life with each other. Smiling removed any barriers and discarded any value judgment about that moment. I felt closer to that community than any I've ever been in even though I knew it hardly at all.

It was uncomfortable for me to return to Western society after experiencing Java. Most everyone I passed never looked at me, and those that did seemed ill at ease with me gazing at them in a friendly manner. This is so sad to me. Just think of all the stories faces tell; how inconceivable it is that beneath our lifetimes of diverse experience we are all on the same biological journey. We see ourselves as separate, but each of our lives is composed of the experiences we have with everyone else’s. If we love ourselves, than we must equally love everyone else; our lives are too interconnected to be able to distinguish.

In greeting others with a smile we welcome our experience of the other person as a part of our life.  It shows we have no fear of opening our hearts to others because we know that love is an individual decision; it cannot be taken away by someone else. You loveyourself by being happy that you are on this earth and smiling. You give love when you are happy to share this earth with another. It is your decision alone. It is wonderful when you get a smile back, but that is not the most important part. There is no need to believe that one person smiling can change the world—only to know that your smiling will change your life.

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